Sunday, November 1, 2009

You again

I haven’t posted much of substance lately. Thanks to an ever-increasing workload  (wah wah) and abundance of fun things to do in Qatar (not joking), I’ve ignored all  blog accountability. I had a strategy though - after posting that video of Ovechkin, I figured you’d all be sufficiently grossed out and not visit for a while. Please come back now.

So Tribeca’s been pretty sweet. In a drastic change of character, Doha felt like a bustling city this past weekend. Tennis, Film Festivals, CHER - there was a lot going on.  On Thursday, we wormed our way into the VIP opening night party. It was aiiiight (boozy). I got so drunk that I smoked in front of DKM’s mother. Then I invited a bunch of relative strangers over for an after party, only to serenade them with Carly Simon’s you’re so vain and get offended when no one joined in.

The next morning I was all, “those people were such duds last night.” And everyone else was like, “no, you were ridiculous and embarrassing. You probably should apologize.”

And that’s how that went. I’m starting boot camp tonight as punishment for jerky behaviour.  

What was I talking about? Right, Tribeca. There were movies too. Thanks to an unnamed source, we had press accreditation through the festival. Press accreditation = free tickets. So what if the tickets were 10 riyal (three dollars) without a press badge? We got to wear neat badges with our photos on them and pretend we are important.

I watched three movies – The September Issue (hilarious), An Education (effectively ruined my Peter Saaaarsgaaard crush but was sooo good, sigh) and Sin Nombre (violent and mean). DKM saw the Spike Lee joint Kobe Doing Work because he’s a sucker. You know I love sports but there’s no chance in hell I was sitting through one and a half hours of Spike Lee fellating Kobe Bryant, whose personality always left something to be desired, in my nuanced opinion. But get this - Kobe Doing Work is a documentary about one game of basketball. One game! And it’s not even a playoff game. Spike Lee made a feature length film from probably two hours of footage? Sounds like he phoned that one in. Pass.

Sin Nombre is one of those artsy, hard-to-watch but “really good” movies that had everyone in the audience clapping through the credits.  It’s about gangs and emigration in Honduras. Violence and unhappiness prevails. Everyone said they loved it because they’re probably scared someone might tell them they’re stupid if they don’t.  I would have rather spent that time looking at rainbows and smiling. I prefer things that are happy and fuzzy and that you can pet. There’s nothing pettable in that movie.

Happy Halloween everyone. For the first time, I didn’t dress up. Not because I’m mature or above it, but because there are decency dress codes at the clubs now that don’t vibe with my kind of Halloween. Last year, I pulled a Spike Lee and wore a Blondie “costume” that lacked effort and imagination. The Blondie costume came to when I was walking up Queen St. W on my way home from work. Peep my inner monologue: “I can’t believe my work is making me dress up. I have two jobs, damnit, and it’s cold. There’s no time to find something skanky enough to work at a sports bar. Maybe I can just repeat my devil costume from last year. I was the perfect Halloween tramp! Tight red dress, gloves, fishnets, horns and tail. Perfect. What in the hell am I going to wear this year!? Something baggy? Haha yeah right, I’m hilarious. Oh hey here’s that store that sells band t-shirts. That cranky hipster shopkeeper be damned, I’m going in. Oh there’s Blondie.  Grab it fast before shopkeeper with the thrift store glasses (probably fake prescriptions, bastard) judges you any longer. Do you think he knows I’m only shopping here because it’s Halloween? My stars, his hair looks smelly. Is he serious with the man bangs? Aaaand exit. Wouldn’t you know it, band t-shirt store is two doors down from an American Apparel. They sell fugly shiny leggings and headbands. I have big hair. Perfect. I am Blondie. Do you think Debbie Harry would wear a t-shirt with her face on it? Ohhh damnit.”

Elisha clearly went for the skanky-dress-with-some-sort-of-headpiece look. I should have copied. Next year, I’ll do something really awesome. I owe it to myself.

Things I love right now:

GLEE! So proud of myself for jumping on the Glee bandwagon. I've been patting my own back for days. That show is DELIGHTFUL.

2.)  Excellent stuff. Am I really behind the fray on this? Probably. The 13 year-olds who contribute to this site are hilarious. MLIA is soooo much better than FML and TFLN but fall behind far behind LOLCats. Acronym party.

The bruise on my hand that I got from a softball. It looks so cool and I get to tell people that I sort of injured myself playing team sports. We’ve played four games now and it’s great fun.
 DKM’s one of the best players on the team, which I’m thankful for because his skill justifies my presence. Week by week, I’m transforming my noodle arm from tenderized to al dente to hard as a frock. When you only play catcher, you get a lot of throwing practice.

Ed Note - I'm still having trouble formatting my blog in Google Chrome (no I'm not switching to Firefox, I will stay true to the Chromium), so apologies if this reads wonky. It might be because you're viewing this on Internet Explorer, and if you are, please stop trying to kill the Internet. Otherwise, let me know if you're having trouble viewing pages and I'll take it up with Blogger. K bai!

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