This situation calls for Pump Up Music Day! I capitalize in hopes it will become a national holiday in the future. During Pump Up Music Day, one must assemble playlists that put you in a fabulous frame of mind-- The right tunes at the right time, and you’re ready to take on the muthafuckin’ world.
Pump Up Music Day comes from my brother Benjamin, who used to play Norman Greenbaum’s Spirit in the Sky before every exam. He would bop around and get so excited to write a bloody test. It was inspiring. As an older brother, Benjamin is a kickass influence. Even when he beat the shit out of me, I still learned something. This is the same brother who would buy me a chocolate bar for every successful bodycheck I threw in hockey. Benjamin is probably the only reason my girlfriends think I can beat them up, even though I’m quite small.
And yes, I’m going off topic here, but my friends and I often rank ourselves in order of who would win in a fight. Lindsay is usually ranked first, then me, then Kate, then Danielley, then Mal (don’t tell Mal, she thinks she’s the strongest haha) and finally Cath. She comes last because she possesses the soul of a lamb and bruises easily. We’ve never tested this theory, because that’s what I’m planning for my bachelorette party. Feats of strength! No boys allowed.
As for my Loose Moose friends—Kelly wins the girl fight hands down. Nobody wants to fight Kelly. She’s this smoking girl who is also really tough. I love Kelly because like me, she tries to beat people up when she’s drunk. Our friend Kara once narrowly survived a cab ride with Kelly, emerging with severe bite marks and bruises. Totally hot.
Back to the matter at hand. My pump up playlist depends on the severity of the situation one faces. You can create a pump up playlist for any scenario, really. Even sad ones. Have you ever made a breakup pump up playlist while drunk? Makes for an interesting evening.
If I’m about to write a joke exam, like sociology of marriage, for instance (no disrespect, soc majors-- I can't help it you chose to sleepwalk through university), a lighthearted songlist will do. This Charming Man, by The Smiths is always always included.
Today, at this moment, I’m all over Band on the Run, by Paul McCartney & Wings. I listened to it six times yesterday and was accused of “killing the song.” I’ve been listening to Band on the Run for years and I’m not sick of it yet so shutttt up your face.
I’m also crazy about Wedding Bell Blues by Laura Nyro. You might not recognize the title or the artist, but giver a listen. You’ll loves it, I promise.
After I’ve worked myself up to a near frenzy, it’s time to cool down with my all-time favourite song. Meredith's number one song of all time. This is a big fucking deal people.... it's Sleepwalk by Santo & Johnny. This song is pure romance. It takes me places I’ve never been and I absoultely adore it. I want it played for me as I walk down the street, every day. I know you didn't listen to the other songs, but this one tune demands it. Go. NOW.
I’ve included YouTube links to all of these songs to further your musical education. I’m sorry if you’re at work and can’t listen to Sleepwalk, because it will instantly put you in a good mood. Give it a listen sometime and see f you don’t instantly crave a malt shake.
I feel better already.