Seriously, all summer Phelps fucked with my reasoning. My rollercoaster ride with Phelpsy went a little something like this:
"Ahh! Holy hell, that kid is FUG!! "
"Ohhh it's the body. I totally get it. Its amazingness balances out his mug."
"Nope. No fucking way. Nothing can trump that FACE. Oh my god that FACE!! How can he be a national hero!? Fukkinay, I'm going to see a lot of him and it will destroy me."
"Aww, but look at his mom! She loves him soo much, he must be a good guy."
"Fucking pansy ass momma's boy! Get out of my head. I hate you."
"He's hosting SNL. Kid has a sense of humour, I think I like him again."
"Fucking asshole! That was the worst hosting job I have.ever.seen. The Olympics are overrrr and you're always wearing clothes now. YOU MAKE ME SICK."
Look at the contrast between hot and horrifying in that photo. Michael Phelps drives me insane.
Pain temporarily eased...