While lazing in employment limbo, I’ve immersed myself in all things Doha. I drive (am chauferred) instead of walk, shop excessively and drink really expensive cocktails in hotels. I've also visited the club (yes there's only one) several times, something I stopped doing in Canada before I was legally allowed inside. I even joined the Qatar facebook network. Turns out, being female with hair and eyes makes you a target for private messages from the lonely/bored men with whom you share a city.
For your amusement, exhibit A (I’ve removed names to preserve dignity):
I've seen your photos with ***, she's a good friend of mine, I met her in Dubai,
and being completely honest, I couldn't resist sending you a message telling you
that I have seen alotta beauty in my life but your beauty is outta this world,
good god!!! he was taking his time creatin' you!! LOL....I'm sorry but whatever
I've just said sounds very cheesy! I'm not like that, but I just had to say
Exclamation pont is the mayor of comma city. My favourite part is when he drops the nastiest line ever and claims he’s not cheesy. This message reeks of expired gouda. It would have been almost funny if he wholly embraced the cheese and dropped an equally bad follow-up line. Something about how sore my ass must be after falling from heaven. I hate squandered opportunities.
When I didn’t respond, I received this message a few days later:
No reply Miss Canadia??!!!Not sure where Canadia is, but it sounds exotic.
That same day, I received a less offensive message from another local bloke:
hi , h r u ? wish u have anice morningi would be honored if u allow me be ur
friend & accept to add my name to ur friend listmy name is **** , i m 28 ys
single doctor from egypt works here in qatar since june 2006 as doctor of
construction company here,, usually i dont go out so often , thats why i try to
make friends through interneti wish u answer me, & hope my message didnt
This one made me a little sad. At least he's polite. Poor, tragic boy in the desert with no one to call his own. Doha can be a lonely place. If I had moved here with no friends, no contacts, I’d probably be talking to my towels by now. Warm, fluffy guys they are. Still, there are sites like qatarliving and iloveqatar which have forums for internet dating. Then again, if no one wrote me, who would I make fun of on Hack the Bone?
I don’t have a public facebook profile— That shit is for attention whores and local DJs. I also don’t broadcast my relationship status. As my wise friend Lindsay says, who happens to be in a happy, committed relationship with a hilarious dude, “I never want anyone to see the little broken heart beside my name. It’s embarassing.” While I don’t necessarily have to worry about that anymore, I am engaged after all (lah dee dah), my fiance doesn’t broadcast his status either, and if he won’t do it…well, I have my pride, damnit!
Maybe we all should read this story about a British man who killed his wife because of her ‘single’ facebook status. That ish would never go down in Canadia.